Whenever Sam has a date lined up with his girl, he has his heart thumping and blood pressure soaring! Talking to his girlfriend and managing to hold her interest beyond two to three dates has almost become a Herculean task for him.
The gelled hair, Levi's jeans with an expensive T-shirt and a cool pair of shades may do the initial trick of attracting a girl of your choice, but what next? How do you proceed from there? Your exemplary sense of dressing apart, communication and presentation skills play a key role in wooing a girl.
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For guys like Sam who believe that dating ultimately culminates into love and marriage, Valentines Day is more like a doomsday. Valentine's Days have come and gone but far from Sam's dates culminating into friendship, his girlfriends have never remained beyond two dates. So exactly what are the things you need to be talking to your girlfriend/date to hold her interest beyond those customary 2 dates? Sam wonders. If similar woes bog you down, then read on.
Good physical appearance with well-styled clothes is a sure-shot way of making an impression on a girl. At times, the initial 'first impression' soon turns into disappointment the moment the guy opens his mouth and lets a tirade of words tumble out, much to the dismay of his listener. These words, far from being pearls of wisdom need not necessarily reflect the no-holds- barred trait in you.
Conversation means one person talks and the other listens, and remember it's also vice-versa. Proving to your girlfriend that you are a great conversationalist does not mean that you talk continuously about your hobbies, your interest or your goals.
Show her you care by also talking about things that matter to her and really listen to her answers.
Conversation can just start by asking her about her day at work/college. Listen to what she has to say and take turns in talking. To build a good rapport, your discussion can center around mundane topics like movies, the latest hot spots in town, sports etc. So the trick is to share issues, but at the same time, she need not necessarily read you like a book. Pay attention and do not grill.
She must feel that you do have space in your life for her and her feelings. Sharing a joke or an anecdote with your girlfriend is a great way of putting her at ease (if on a first date). It can also act as a de-stressor after a hard day's work.
Talking about heavy-duty topics like crime, violence or things you hate can be unwise. The point is that incessant chatter, however interesting or silly, will lead you nowhere. Do not be boastful about your previous conquests.
Talking about your ex-girlfriends will make her feel that her presence in your life is of least importance. A date with your girlfriend should be an experience to remember and cherish. Using your girlfriend as a punching bag (metaphorical sense, please) leaves no scope for growth in your relationship. Avoid venting out your frustrations, insecurities and dejections on your girlfriend. Instead, steer the conversation to the topics of her interest, like her job or career.
Girls today work just as hard as boys do and they also treat their profession with utmost seriousness. So learn to respect the ambition and profession of your girlfriend. If you know nothing about the profession your girlfriend is in, do a little bit of research and background work about her job. This will reflect your level, of interest in her and also in things that interest her. Talk to her about her career prospects, her rapport with her colleagues, her future plans.
Your comfort level and compatibility with your girlfriend should reach a certain level where both of you talk about anything and everything without any inhibitions. Talk about each other's fears or problems, together you may probably find a solution. Be honest, if you have a hidden secret which may have a way of coming back and jeopardizing your relations, then talk about it. It may not only boost your self-esteem but may help in strengthening your relationship.
If you are brimming with creativity or possess an artistic streak in you, then why resort to the colloquial way of wooing your girl? Put your feelings and thoughts into a poem or a haiku, a time-tested formula that has impressed girls from the Roman era!
Last but not the least, talking to your girlfriend without any hang-ups about your emotions and feelings is crucial . All said and done, at the end of the day, your girl may expect some kind of a compliment probably on the way she looks, her dressing sense, a new hair-do or you can just compliment her choice of food or perfect skills in communication! Giving your girl a bouquet of roses, a box of chocolates or a soft, cuddly toy, are some of the pleasant interjections that should not be overlooked.
But bear in mind that words weave a magic of their own that no materialistic items can replace. Words, that are honest and are a true reflection of your feelings, can trigger a mixture of intense emotions in your girlfriend. These feelings can range from mere admiration to adoration or to even love!