How to Meet Guys in a New City


While moving to a new city can bring exciting new possibilities, it can also leave you bereft of your old social network. It may take a while to make new friends and discover where the hot guys really hang out. So if you have recently relocated and are looking to kick-start your social life, here are some tips on meeting guys in a new city.

Ask around at work

Perhaps the most common reason why people relocate is to take advantage of better job opportunities or better educational prospects. So you probably already know where you are going to work or study in your new city. Let your co-workers or classmates be your first guide in helping you negotiate the social possibilities of your new hometown. Thus keep an open mind and make casual conversation with everyone from your manager to the guy who fixes the photocopy machine. Since you're still considered "the new girl", you will be getting a certain degree of attention. Use this to your advantage to make contacts and jot down phone numbers, since you never know who may turn out to be useful in what manner. Make that extra effort to be social and you will find that the network you are building now will stand you in good stead later on.

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Go out more often

Among the first people to form your social circle in a new city will probably be again those you work or study with. Don’t fret or shut yourself out even if they don’t seem to be the kind of people you like hanging out with. So try to eat lunch at the cafeteria instead of gulping down your sandwiches at your desk or in your cubicle; that way you will be more visible and consequently people will notice you more and perhaps even ask you out. When someone asks you to join them for a coffee during an office break or at the ‘happy hour’ after work, by all means do so, even if they may not seem “your type”. You never know - they may have friends you would be interested in getting to know better.

Show initiative

Even at your workplace, there may be many people you never get to meet except for special occasions like office parties or the fund raising dinner. A wonderful way to expand your circle of contacts is to volunteer to be part of planning committees which organize such dos. Apart from bringing you in touch with new guys, such initiatives will also earn you brownie points with your boss.

Open up to your neighbors

Neighbors are one of the best resources on local knowledge; they can not only tell you where the juiciest steaks are to be found but can also let you know where the hip crowds hang out on weekends. So the next time you see someone collecting mail in the lobby downstairs or washing his car down your street, smile and ask a question which shows you are new to the city. Get chatting with neighbors and even though you may not feel safe enough to invite someone over for a cup of coffee just yet, by all means accept the basket of cookies or a potted plant a neighbor brings for you. Even as you keep your personal safety in mind, don’t be snooty and unresponsive since down the line good neighbors can make all the difference between a regular address and a great place to live. Over time as you get to know the people living around you better, don’t pass up invitations to their pool parties or barbeque evenings. Even though you find the next-door Mrs. Brown rather stuffy, you may hit off well with her handsome young nephew.

Drop by your local religious center

You may have never been very active in your church while growing up or even particularly spiritual, don’t discount the power of local religious affiliations in building up a social network. People with whom you share a common religious, linguistic or ethnic background can go a long way in making you feel welcome and loved in a new city; so remember to drop by your church on days of special service, religious occasions or holidays and you are sure to find lots of new faces. Above all your local religious center is one of the safest ways to meet men when you are new to the city. Frequenting bars and nightclubs late at night might make for a rocking social life but can leave you exposed to danger at a place where you are yet to build up a support system.

Join a hobby club

Once you have settled down in the new city and find that you have free time on your hands, consider joining a hobby or special interest club. Ask around your co-workers or trusted neighbors on where you can find a club catering to your interest or search on the internet. You could browse through book-reading clubs, amateur dramatic societies or even wine-appreciation clubs. Pursuing a favorite activity will not only help you to feel less lonely but also bring you in touch with guys you are likely to share a common interest with.

Take a course

Once you have more time to spare, you could even consider taking a short course or learning an art or sports that you have always wanted to. Options could be as varied as learning the tango, picking up rock climbing or trying your hand at exotic Asian cuisine. Learning something new will not only add excitement and zest to your life but help you to get in touch with a great variety of potential partners who have signed up to learn the same thing as you.

When you have managed to find a few trusted friends, you may feel more comfortable hanging out at bars and nightclubs. Initially it is always better to go out in a group; that way your personal safety is not only assured but you can also get acquainted with your friends’ acquaintances, some of whom might turn out to be date-worthy.