Dating for introverts can very often be an intimidating experience since romantic relationships – especially new ones – involves reaching out to others. For someone who is naturally shy like you, the whole routine of making small talk with unfamiliar people, getting out of the comfort zone and making the first move can be quite unnerving if not downright frightening. But here are few ways you can break into the dating scene with relative ease and privacy.
Enlist the help of friends and family
Instead of enduring consecutive nights of discomfort in a bar or nightclub, let your friends and family know that you are interested in meeting new people. This is a good idea firstly because they are aware of your shyness and hence will be careful to set you up with a partner who is compatible with your personality type. Secondly, dating will become that much easier for you when people you already know introduce you to their friends and family.
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Join a hobby class
Now is the right time to take up a hobby that has always interested you but that you never really got down to pursuing. Join a Thai cooking class or one that teaches how to make painted pottery. On the other hand if you are the outdoor type, opt for a gardening course or join a bird-watching society. There are hundreds of interests you can choose from, limited only by the range of classes and societies available in your town or city and the amount of time you can spare. By joining a new class, you will not only be expanding your social circle, but best of all you can be more or less sure of having similar interests in case you meet somebody interesting. Small talk can be particularly torturous for introverts which is why friendships built on common purposes can be more successful than those built around activities like meeting for a drink. For an introvert, that means no longer being tongue-tied at a date but lots to discuss on the finer points of glass painting or French wine tasting.
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Consider volunteer work
Dating for introvert singles can begin with a genuine desire to help other people. Volunteer work means you don’t have to chat up a whole lot of people if you don’t wish to. You could just quietly go on with your job and leave the public relations to others. But be sure to volunteer for work which is suited to your interests or akin to a cause you believe in. It could be as varied as helping out at a homeless shelter to tending the community center garden. If you are spiritually-inclined consider volunteering at your local church or if you love reading, ask if you can help out thrice a week at the community library. Helping others can not only be immensely personally satisfying but a great way to enrich the community too. And if in the process, you come across a like-minded single, what better way to begin a meaningful relationship.
The internet is a great tool for making friends and finding dating partners. For shy people, joining a dating website means reaching out to other members at his or her own pace and according to compatible personality types. An online date service already handles the nerve-racking first contact. By perusing online dating profiles, a shy person can start getting to know someone without having to say a word. Moreover the early stages of a relationship can even be conducted online, letting people who are shy interact freely and minus their inhibitions which are more likely to surface in an actual dating scene. Once an introverted single is comfortable using a dating site, he or she can go on to explore social networking sites which are also amazing ways to make new friends online. Again, certain dating sites have their own compatibility testing method which helps introverts to choose the right dating partners. Other portals follow a system of friend-based referrals with which shy people can be more comfortable. Besides these, there are also dating sites like shypassions.com which cater specifically to the relationship needs of introverts.
Look in the right places
If the only dating opportunities that you know about are the pub and the gym, then you have been looking in the wrong places. Rather view normal experiences such as having a cappuccino in your favorite coffee shop or walking your dog in the neighborhood park as opportunities to meet someone interesting. The main thing is to keep your mind open to new experiences since you may never know who might come over to chat about the book that you have been reading at the coffee shop or admire the healthy coat of your Lab in the park.
Give extroverts a chance
There is nothing says that introverts cannot have a romantic relationship with extroverts. However if you are an introvert, you may be wary of people who talk and laugh too much and are always surrounded by people. But this is no reason to consider them as shallow, overly chatty or mindless. On the contrary, many extroverts often maintain steady relationships and have strong loyalties. So give other people around you a chance and don’t turn down a potential date for the mere reason that he/she seems to enjoy being around people more than you do. In fact you may even be pleasantly surprised to find that two opposing personality types can complement each other wonderfully in a romantic relationship.
Being an introvert does not mean you have to spend your weekends alone. While finding a date would certainly require some amount of effort on the part of a shy person, it need not always be a nerve-wracking experience. With the right person and at the right venue, you are sure to enjoy every minute of your date. And remember there are lots of singles looking for a sensitive soul like you.