Body language, employed effectively, is the most priceless weapon in the flirting artillery. While the way you groom yourself and the verbal language you use matters, the way you conduct yourself and the image you project is even more crucial.
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A few tips to make the most of your body language and flirt your way to success:
Stand with squared shoulders; don’t make the mistake of slouching. It creates a very poor image. An erect carriage speaks well, can even make you look taller and more impressive. Standing with feet slightly apart (but not too wide a stance), with one hand in the pocket and maybe a glass in the other hand, gives a cool and casual appearance. Both hands thrust aggressively in the pockets does not send out good signals. In a bar or pub you could lean up against a wall and run a lazy eye over your target, there’s something predatory yet appealing about it.
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Don’t be afraid to cast appreciative glances and convey with your eyes what you are too far away to say with words. Also, don’t leave it at just a couple of glances. After you make eye contact, ensure that you repeatedly glance at her. You have to make eye contact at least a couple of times more for her to get the message. If she looks away and doesn’t make eye contact again, you may take it as an indication that she is either shy or isn’t interested. But if she is shy, she will inadvertently glance your way again as if she can’t stop herself. That’s your cue. If she makes eye contact with you several times, she’s letting you know she’s fair game.
Even before you approach a woman, you can start making use of your hands. If you’ve been checking her out from across the room and making eyes at each other, you could casually raise your glass to her in a silent toast and gauge her response. If she responds in kind likewise, you’ve already broken the ice somewhat. It makes approaching her much easier. Or you could touch your fingers to your forehead in a mock salute! It depends on the setting and the kind of woman you’re trying to woo.
Once you approach her and introduce yourself, offer a firm handshake. One of the biggest turn-offs for a woman when she meets a man, who interests her, is if he offers her a limp handshake. It tells you a lot about the person. Avoid standing with your arms folded across your chest; it creates a closed impression. As you get further into the conversation, and if you get more familiar with her, you could touch her elbow, or graze her shoulder casually. If things are going really well, you could even tuck a wisp of her hair, real or imaginary, behind her ear. Or trail your fingers lightly down her arm. This is only if you sense that she’s warmed up to you sufficiently, else don’t push it too soon.