How to Tell if your Wife is Having an Affair

With the anonymity of modern society and even more of the internet, cheating on a spouse seems to have more common than before. So if you have a gut feeling that something is off in your marriage but can’t seem to put your finger on it, chances are that your intuition is right. If you are a man and believe that your wife is cheating on you, here are some signs to watch out for.

She has suddenly become more secretive

If your wife was comfortable sharing her various things about her life with you earlier, but now seems to have developed a sudden need for privacy, it could be because she has a secret to keep, one that involves another man. She may be using several passwords to prevent you from knowing her computer activity or cell phone and credit card bills may be hidden from your view. If you ask why or attempt to find out information that used to be common knowledge between the two of you, she may react angrily by accusing you off snooping or trying to control her movements.

TIP: Read the guide to prevent a break up or get back with your ex.

Her regular work habits have changed

If you have been married for a while, by now you probably have a fair idea about your wife’s work habits – for instance if she prefers to bring work home or put in an extra hour at the workplace; if she is a morning person or prefers to work till late at night. If you notice significant change in work habits, it could be a sign that she is trying to accommodate someone else in her life. Working late, going to work at odd hours or, putting in more time than is normal on work related issues can be indications that your wife is seeing somebody.

She spends long hours on the computer and phone

The immense strides made in internet technology in the last couple of years means that there are more options in communication than ever. Thus it is no longer necessary for cheating partners to leave the house to have an affair – emails, chat sessions and Skyping can all be various means to stay in touch with a lover. In fact the ease of internet chat rooms, online dating sites and secret email accounts has caused an alarming increase in emotional affairs where actual sex is not part of the equation. So if your wife is spending unusually long hours on the computer and what’s more being very careful with her privacy settings, it could be because she is communicating with someone she shouldn’t.  Likewise she may be spending more time talking on the phone, especially cell phones and then hang up suddenly when you enter the room. If you find her erasing the history on the cell phone and becoming vague or defensive when asked about it, then you might want to check her phone records.

She can’t explain erratic behavior

This includes the many little things in your wife’s behavior or regular routine that don’t add up. For instance your wife may be away for a while both from home and work and yet not able to explain her absence. Or she may not be present where she is supposed to be, like at your child’s school on a parent’s day. Also watch out for items or clothing your wife is missing at home or evidence of clothes and accessories among her stuff that doesn’t belong to your wife. One of the surest signs of cheating is when a person is caught in little lies about the details of the day – like your wife may claim to have got late returning home as she had to return books to the library when it turns out that the library was closed at the time for repairs.

Unusual receipts in her possession

One of the surest giveaways in case of a spouse having an affair are financial documents that cannot be satisfactorily explained. The most common among these are credit card receipts for restaurant dinners which you have not eaten or gifts which you have not purchased in your family. If your wife is paying in cash, there could be large amounts of ATM withdrawals from her bank account. This in itself would not necessarily mean that she is having an affair, but if the trend is something new and in context of a sudden secrecy about her movements, it could mean that she is spending money on someone else.

She claims that they are just friends

If you have a particular person in mind and ask your wife about him, more likely than not she will claim that “we’re just friends”. Incredible though it may seem because of its predictability, this is still one of the most common excuses that a cheating spouse will come up with when asked to explain an unusual involvement with an outsider.  But if you are sure your wife is spending more and more time with this new "friend"; then there is probably more to it than mere friendship. She may feel that she has a lot in common with this person, that this person understands her and things she is going through. Whatever the reasons for the ‘friendship’, it should be taken as an important indicator that your wife’s priorities are going haywire.

She wants more space from you

When in the grip of an affair, a person seeks to spend more time with the new partner and consequently tries to move away from the primary relationship. In a cheating wife, this may take the shape of a request to given more space which usually means time alone or away from the family. Your wife may say it is due to excessive stress at work and she needs to unwind by herself or due to confusion over their feelings arising out of some personal crisis. More often than not, this simply means that she is looking for ways to spend more time with her lover, away from you and the family.