Affairs and infidelity

Today infidelity ranks among the top reasons for breakdown in marriages.  While growing instances of cheating leads many to take recourse to spying on spouses, questions remain on the ethics and indeed the practical advantages, if any, of the practice.

We live in a day and age where dating has become one of America’s favorite past-times.  So much so in fact that dating is no longer limited to the single girl or guy. We’re also living in a time where monogamy and the sanctity of marriage is becoming less and less recognized, and even worse, less revered.

The perfect relationship is based on mutual trust and faith and so in an ideal world, you would not need to take any measures at all to keep your guying from straying. But in these times of cell-phone sexting and 24/7 online porn, a little preventive medicine may be just the thing your relationship needs. So here are a few tips on how to keep your man where he belongs – with you.

Deception is one of the foremost causes why couples breakup. Lies, whether driven by infidelity, financial irresponsibility or addictions can tear apart even the most compatible of couples. In keeping with recent advances in technology, there has been a trend of using lie detector tests to find out if a partner is cheating. But then how effective is this and should something like this figure at all in a relationship?

What is a lie detector test?

Infidelity has been around as long as men and women were falling in love and swearing to remain true. But while the traditional meaning of cheating was being sexually involved with a person other than your partner, now there is the concept of an emotional affair. In these times when spatial distances are easily bridged by Skyping and chatting, affairs can be possible even without any physical connection. Then there is the good o’ “we’re just friends” model where one can have an affair with a co-worker, a high-school pal or a previous neighbor without being sexually involved.

Any kind of infidelity causes pain and suffering in a committed relationship. Even then there is almost something horrifying and unclean about paid sex which is enough to devastate a marriage since in this case, there is not even the fig leaf of a special connection which is often used to excuse an extra-marital affair. If for some reason you suspect your husband of getting paid sex, here are a few things to keep in mind.

Human relationships can lend themselves to any number of complexities – just when you thought you were getting the differences between casual dating and a relationship or had learnt to spot the many nuances of dating, you were confronted with the concept of friends with benefits.  While the idea of friendship between opposite sexes turning into a sexual relationship is not really new, the term gained popular currency with the 2011 movie, Friends with Benefits, starring Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis.

If life were a movie, you would live happily ever after once you got married. Unfortunately life isn’t so and there may come a juncture in your marriage when you find yourself involved in an extra-marital affair. The worst part of having an affair is knowing that you are being unfair to three parties at a time – your spouse, your lover and yourself.

Every woman with a married boyfriend knows what it is to endure the uncertainty and anxiety that are an intrinsic part of such a relationship. And even when he agrees to leave his wife and family, can you really trust him – a person with a history of infidelity who has once gone back on his wedding vows and may do so yet again?

Every religion has its set of scriptures and divine commandments. More often than not, these serve as the basis for governing the larger social and moral norms in the group. Among the social institutions often at the site of continuous religious discourse is marriage, especially in modern times when economic forces and personal choice have emerged as challenges to traditional ways of living. Here is what the Bible, holy both to Christians and Jews, has to say about adultery in marriage.


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