One of the most complicated ways of initiating a relationship is one that involves a turning a female friend into a lover. You risk losing a friend but if successful you benefit from gaining a lover whom you already know as an incredible person to be with. Moreover it is much better to take a chance than continue to imagine how great it could have been between you two and suffer in silence. So here are a few tips which you can use to turn a close female friend into a lover.
Remove yourself from her life
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If you want your female friend to want you as something more than a shoulder to cry on, then make yourself unavailable. Stop calling and meeting her or even sending her mails and text messages. If she gives you a call, asking you to get in touch, wait for a couple of days before calling her back. Let this go on for around a month or more if she is an especially close friend. However don’t make her feel that you are staying away because you are mad at her. When you do speak to her, be brief but pleasant. The whole point here is to confuse her into wondering into what is going on with your life and this confusion will make her spend more time thinking about you.
Pay attention to your looks
Use the time away from your female friend into acquiring a new and attractive look. Pay more attention to your wardrobe and appearance. Once you slip in the role of a friend it is easy to get casual about your looks so that you may be comfortable in your sweats before her or think nothing about hugging her even if you haven’t showered in a couple of days. But if you want your friend to be attracted to you as a lover, it is imperative that you take care of your personal hygiene since you’ll impress her more by looking and smelling good. Also make sure that you work out regularly and have a healthy diet. Healthy lifestyle habits will not only lead to a fitter and more irresistible you but will benefit your own health in the long run – lover or no lover. Finally, when she meets you after a long time, it is crucial that there is a very marked improvement in your appearance if you want her to think of you in a sexual way.
Enhance your personality
Along with improving your personal style, it is also necessary to enhance your personality if you want to impress your female friend. Learn a new language, join a dance class or pursue an interest which you always wanted but never had time for. Expanding your range of activities will make her aware that you have other interesting aspects to your personality. Moreover it help you to acquire more confidence in yourself which may eventually prove more effective than a new haircut or wardrobe to help her to see you in a new light.
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Keep up your social life
Along with using the above strategies to make yourself appear attractive, make sure your female friend knows that other girls find the new you irresistible. As you keep your distance from her, make sure you continue to have an active social life. Don’t date anyone seriously but hang around girls when you go out in a group. If you both are active on at least one social networking site like MySpace or Facebook, she is sure to check out your profile to know what is happening with you. Change your profile and make it snazzier. Also post some photos of you having a good time with friends and even other girls. But in your efforts to make her jealous, you have to tread a fine line – it should be enough to set her wondering on what is going on in your life but going overboard will convince her that you are merely interested in chasing skirts rather than having a relationship with her.
Use your advantage
As a friend you already know what turns her on in a man. Use the inside knowledge to your advantage and remember that here you have an edge over other men. If she likes smart men, get yourself updated on world affairs or if she digs men with a sense of adventure, suggest that you both go for a hike in the mountains. And if you happen to know her secret desires, drop subtle hints that she may be pleasantly surprised to know how much you have to offer her.
Flirt with her
After you have roused a reasonable level of interest, go on to flirt casually with your female friend. Compliment her on her eyes, smile and sense of style. Lightly touch her hand or shoulder when you both are hanging out. Help her to notice that you are aware of her as a woman and not just as a friend. At the same time tease her a little bit on her platonic attitude and challenge her to recognize love when it is right before her.
Choose the right time and place
If you find that despite your subtle efforts, there is no reciprocation from your female friend, it may be time to come clear on your feelings. Use a quiet moment to talk to her and tell her that you are romantically interested in her. But make sure you don’t choose too private a place for it will deny her an exit in case she is uncomfortable with your revelations. Finally don’t force a public confession on her which might unnerve or embarrass her.
After you let your friend know how you feel about her, don’t press her for an immediate response. Let her take her time to sort out her feelings and in the meantime assure her that no matter what she decides, you are will value the platonic relationship you already share. However don’t wait indefinitely and if a month has passed by without a response, gently ask her what she feels about your relationship and take it from there.
Turning a friend into a lover may be fraught with complications. But if it is something you really want, then go ahead and let your feelings be known. If you are successful, there is nothing better than having a lover with whom you already share a comfortable relationship. And if not, you can either continue the friendship or leave it at that.